Day 85 of 100 Days of Hope
Why is it so difficult to accept ourselves?
Most of us are incredibly generous with compassion when it comes to other people. We forgive their mistakes. We understand when they are tired, overwhelmed, or figuring things out. We give grace freely.
Yet when it comes to ourselves, that same grace disappears.
Instead of kindness, we criticize. Instead of patience, we push harder. We hold ourselves to impossible standards and then wonder why we feel exhausted, discouraged, or disconnected from who we truly are.
So here’s an honest question:
Is self-punishment actually helping you become who you want to be?
For most people, the answer is no.
The Hidden Cost of Self-Criticism
Self-criticism often masquerades as motivation. We believe that if we’re harder on ourselves, we’ll do better, be better, and finally feel good enough. But over time, this approach creates burnout, shame, and a constant sense of falling short.
When we’re stuck in self-judgment, everything feels heavier. Decisions become harder. Rest feels undeserved. And joy gets postponed until some imaginary future version of ourselves shows up.
But growth doesn’t come from punishment.
It comes from compassion.
A Simple Mantra That Changes Everything
There’s one practice I return to again and again—especially in moments when I feel overwhelmed, tired, or unsure.
“I accept myself for being human.”
This single sentence creates immediate relief. It reminds us that being human means we will make mistakes. We will have seasons of clarity and seasons of confusion. We will get tired, need help, and sometimes not know our next step.
And that is not a failure.
That is life.
Self-acceptance doesn’t mean giving up or lowering your standards. It means allowing yourself to grow without shame. It gives you permission to slow down, ask for support, and stop over-functioning just to prove your worth.
Learning to Honor Where You Are
Recently, I’ve been reminded of this truth in a very personal way. I’ve been sick with a cold, and my body has been asking me to slow down. Instead of pushing through or criticizing myself for not doing more, I’ve been practicing self-acceptance.
That has looked like resting more. Doing less. Giving myself space to heal without guilt.
And what I’ve noticed is this: when we let go of the constant have-to’s and should’s, life becomes gentler. Our nervous system settles. Our mind clears. We begin to trust ourselves again.
If You’re Struggling, You’re Not Alone
If you’re in a hard place right now, it’s okay.
If you don’t know your next move, that’s fine.
If you feel like an imposter or like you’re just winging it—welcome to being human.
So many people you admire feel the same way. They’ve just learned to stop making it mean something is wrong with them.
Self-deprecation isn’t helping you heal or grow.
Self-acceptance will.
I’ve seen this shift create real transformation in my clients and in my own life. When people stop fighting themselves, something powerful opens up—clarity, confidence, and peace.
Start Here
Try saying this out loud:
“I accept myself for being human.”
Say it again.
Let it land.
You don’t have to do everything.
You don’t have to know everything.
You don’t have to be perfect to be worthy.
You are enough.
You always have been.
True growth begins when you start with yourself—offering the same compassion, patience, and love you so freely give to others.